no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize