ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
