Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize