dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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