Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Randomize
