That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
