Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
