Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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