I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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