im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
