Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Randomize
