Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
