addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
