I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
