yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Randomize
