It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
