I hope mine doesn't look like that
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Randomize
