Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
