mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Randomize
