fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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