His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Randomize
