How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
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