he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Randomize
