Those balls look pretty dangerous.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
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