She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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