i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
