what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Randomize
