I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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