i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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