Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Randomize
