I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
