Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
