There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
you guys were way drunker than both of me
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
