wakey wakey hands off snakey
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
This is the high leading the old right now
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
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