He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
