I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I'm lost and stupid without you.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize