Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
