yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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