Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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