i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Randomize
