The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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