everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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