he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
