I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
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