you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Randomize
