Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
