I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
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