Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Randomize
