I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
