I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
