is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize