I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
