i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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